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FOOTBALL RPF FIC: Mi cama es tu cama
Title: Mi cama es tu cama
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 3958
Warnings: Underage semi-sexual exploration, nothing too explicit
Summary: It doesn't make sense for Leo to leave La Masia for siesta, so naturally he ends up in Cesc's bed. Lionel Messi/Francesc Fábregas/Gerard Piqué bromance/pre-slash, a.k.a. Baby Dream Team romantic friendship problems.
Author’s Notes: Thanks very much to![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
jezziejay, my faithful beta, and to uphemism for the amazing, adorable artwork she made to accompany this piece! And thanks to the mods of ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
futbal_minibang for providing the pressure I needed to set my work aside for a while and write again.
“My favorite,” Cesc Fábregas whooped as he arrived at the front of the line with his cafeteria tray and spotted the pale, succulent lengths of sausage, still steaming in the pan.
Behind him, his best friend couldn’t contain a snort. “Whatever they happen to put in front of you is your favorite.”
Cesc snagged an extra botifarra with his fingers, winking at the server, who smiled back and pretended she hadn’t witnessed the theft. “It’s a good life philosophy,” he told Geri earnestly over his shoulder. “You should try learning from me.”
Lunch tray loaded up at last, he paused and surveyed the dining room. They’d gotten back from morning practice a little late, between Geri getting singled out for a stern talking-to by the manager and Cesc misplacing his favorite shoes after his shower. Most of the tables were already full of hungry, boisterous boys.
Then Cesc spotted one nearly empty table, and Geri followed his gaze and groaned. “Don’t you dare.”
They had approached Leo Messi together on his very first day, curious about the tiny new kid who'd joined their ranks, but when he couldn't manage to do much more than mumble a greeting back, they'd decided that he was mute or a weirdo and left him alone for the most part. Leo was a wonder on the pitch, where he could let his feet do the talking; off it, he was rarely seen and never heard. Even today in the crowded cafeteria, he seemed to be enclosed in his own private bubble of silent solitude.
“It’s the only table left,” Cesc said out of the side of his mouth. “I’m going in.”
“Fine,” Geri sighed, “I’ll cover you,” and together they squared their shoulders and marched over to the corner table where little Leo sat, pushing his food around half-heartedly with his fork.
“Hey,” Cesc said in his loudest and friendliest voice, just in case the kid was hard of hearing as well as mute. “Remember us? Okay if we sit here?”
Leo looked up at them through his messy brown hair. He didn’t say anything in response, but Cesc decided to interpret his slight shrug as agreement and sat down across from him. When Geri hesitated, looming over the table, Cesc arched his eyebrows meaningfully and jerked his head towards the chair beside him. At last Geri sat, nodding briefly at Leo, who looked down at his still-full plate.
It was undeniably awkward, but after all, they were there to eat, so Cesc set to work. Only towards the end of the silent meal did a sudden thought occur to him. He stopped shoveling his food into his face long enough to look over at Leo and ask, "Hey, Leo? It is Leo, right? Where do you sleep during siesta?"
The other boy reddened and seemed to shrink into himself even further. He shook his head once, slowly. "Nowhere. I mean, I don't sleep here."
"Hey, look, it talks." Geri elbowed his friend in the side. "Where's he supposed to sleep, idiot? They don't give day students a private room just so they can take siesta."
"Ow," Cesc said, frowning. He’d been almost sure that Leo didn't have a room - he would have heard - yet he was still shocked by the confirmation. Naps were Cesc's third favorite thing in the world, right after football and food. He couldn't believe that no one had provided a place for Leo to take them. "But don't you get tired?"
"Sometimes," Leo admitted in a small voice. "But it's okay. I don't mind."
"That's ridiculous," Cesc declared, feeling his face heat with indignation. "It's, it's... inhumane. We should do something about it."
"No, wait," Leo said more loudly, looking alarmed. "I don't want to be a nuisance."
Cesc paused, considering; then, suddenly, the simple, obvious solution came to him. "I know. You can sleep with us."
Geri, who had been taking a sip of his water, choked on it a little and started spluttering. "With us?"
"Well, with me, obviously," Cesc clarified, spearing a slice of botifarra with his fork and thrusting it into his mouth. He chewed blissfully for a few seconds and swallowed. "I mean, there's barely enough room in your bed for you." He reached for the last slice, paused with the fork halfway to his mouth as he registered Geri's discomfort. "What?"
"Thanks, but-" Leo began. He looked from Cesc to Geri and back again. "I mean... I wouldn't want to be in the way."
"Don't worry about it," Geri said breezily; whatever his problem had been, he seemed to have gotten over it. "It's not like you take up much space, and anyway, Cesc here could sleep through a nuclear attack."
"See? It's settled." Triumphant, Cesc rounded the table and leaned down, slinging an arm around Leo's slim shoulders. He looked over at Geri, who was arching his eyebrows as if to convey a message that Cesc couldn’t quite catch.
***
As it turned out, Leo had to make a trip to the toilet, so Geri and Cesc had a chance to talk things over in private for a few minutes after all.
"You don't think that sharing your bed with Leo would be a little... weird?" Geri asked, as soon as the smaller boy was out of earshot.
"Nah," Cesc countered cheerfully. "Remember Víctor and Andrés? They even had their own beds, and everyone knows that they slept together."
Geri frowned. "That's different," he said. "I mean, I heard it was because Andrés was really homesick. Anyway, no one would have dared to make fun of them. Because, Víctor." He winced eloquently, a reference to the time he'd chosen exactly the wrong victim for one of his pranks. Cesc had reason to know, though, that any scars were strictly emotional. And anyway, he wasn't about to allow himself to be diverted from his original agenda.
"You think Leo isn't homesick?" Cesc asked quietly, wondering why Geri was being so difficult about this. "I mean, look at him. His whole family is back in Argentina except for his dad. That's way farther than La Mancha. It's gotta be... um... over a thousand kilometers away."
"More like ten thousand, genius," Geri said. He looked amused now, much to Cesc's relief.
"So he can stay with us?" Cesc asked hopefully.
Geri punched him in the arm, not hard. "Sure," he said lightly. "Never could deny you anything."
Cesc eyed Geri's dessert, luscious crema catalana, still lying almost untouched on his plate. "Are you gonna eat that?"
***
Back in their room, Cesc stripped down to his t-shirt and underpants and slipped into the bottom bunk, feeling full and sleepy. Leo hovered awkwardly by the side of the bed, looking like he might change his mind and bolt at any minute.
“Ven aquí,” Cesc coaxed him, patting the pillow next to his head. “Plenty of room.”
Still, Leo hesitated for a second. Then he toed off his trainers and slid in next to Cesc, still fully clothed, and lay on his side, facing away.
Cesc could sense that Leo was being careful not to touch him, so he deliberately placed his hand on the smaller boy’s hip, ignoring the shiver under his palm. “Sweet dreams,” he murmured in Leo’s ear, just before he felt his face split in a huge yawn. The other boy didn’t respond, but Cesc could feel him gradually relaxing, his breaths becoming slower and more even. He let his own eyelids flutter shut.
When Cesc opened his eyes again, squinting against the slanting afternoon light, he discovered that his hand had drifted down to Leo’s waist, holding him close. He also had a hard-on, which was not exactly unusual these days, and he really hoped that Leo hadn’t noticed. Probably not; Leo was snoring softly, his fine hair tickling Cesc’s nose.
He resisted the strong temptation to push forward against Leo’s warmth, instead pulling away as slowly as he could and rolling onto his back. He wished that he could rub one off here and now – it wouldn’t take much, and Cesc certainly had no secrets from Geri – but he suspected that it would be the height of bad manners after persuading someone to share his bed, especially someone as shy as Leo.
Frustrated, he twisted his body in the tight space between Leo’s back and the cool, bare wall until he was lying on his belly. Squeezing his eyes shut, Cesc ground himself slowly against the mattress, the diffuse pressure soothing to his aching dick. He allowed himself a soft moan of relief. Still, he didn’t want to let it go too far, so after a few seconds, he rolled to his hip and stretched out on his side, the tip of his nose only centimeters from the wall.
When he woke up, Leo was sitting on the floor lacing up his trainers. He looked up when he heard Cesc stir. “It’s almost time for practice,” he chirped, looking as cheerful as Cesc had seen him all day.
***
The ice had been broken. In the weeks that followed Cesc’s first spontaneous invitation, the three of them became inseparable. It didn’t hurt that they soon perfected a play in which Geri would bring the ball out from the back and pass it off to Cesc, who would find Leo at the front with a spot-on through ball. The midget was magic, dribbling his way past the opposition’s defense and chipping the ball cheekily over the keeper nine times out of ten. Off the pitch, they swiftly discovered a shared love of Playstation and pizza.
And then, of course, there were the naps.
Sharing his bed with Leo soon stopped being strange and became a comfortable habit, as simple and natural as lacing up his cleats or stealing bits of food off Geri’s plate. Cesc began to look forward to their daily siesta even more than he had before. He found the warm, slightly sour smell of Leo’s skin filling his nostrils, the way that Leo sighed and shifted in his sleep, to be somehow soothing.
Unlike Cesc, though, Leo often seemed to be troubled by bad dreams, although he never talked about them. Cesc tactfully refrained from mentioning the low, anguished moans his bedmate sometimes made, feet twitching and stubby fingers twisting in the sheets. And if Geri could hear him from the upper bunk, he held his tongue.
One day, though, it was worse than usual. Cesc was dragged right out of a dream when Leo jerked awake and sat up in bed beside him, trembling, his pale face pink and shiny with sweat. He looked lost, even littler than usual, and very much alone.
“Leo?” Cesc said hoarsely, still half-asleep. “Are you okay?”
“Yes,” Leo whispered automatically. And then, even more quietly, “No.”
Cesc rubbed at his eyes, fighting to focus. “What’s wrong?”
“I really miss Mami,” Leo mumbled, his words a soft slur that Cesc could barely make out.
“Me too,” Cesc offered, although he knew that it wasn’t the same. He patted the smaller boy on the shoulder. Leo was rigid, practically vibrating under his hand, but he allowed himself to be pushed back down onto the pillow.
“What would your mama do,” he found himself asking, “if she were here?”
“When I’m sick, or upset,” Leo said wistfully, “she strokes my hair.”
Cesc considered this, then reached out and touched Leo tentatively on the head. Leo’s chestnut brown hair was silky and fine, nothing like the stubborn, black, wiry strands of his own hair. Fascinated, he threaded his fingers through it, then smoothed it down. Leo twisted away and made a small, strangled sound. It took Cesc a second to realize that he was crying.
"Oh, Leo," Cesc said helplessly, and because he couldn't think of anything better to do, he wrapped his arms around the smaller boy and cuddled him close. He couldn't see Leo's face, but he could feel him shuddering as he sniffled. On the football field, Leo was so fast, so agile, that Cesc sometimes forgot how little he really was. He couldn't help feeling, in a strange way, privileged to be the witness to his fragility now.
Anyway, the closeness, the warmth of another body against his own... it was nice. It reminded him of when he and Carlota were little and had crawled into each other's beds during thunderstorms, whispering in the dark so as not to wake their parents. And it seemed to be working; Leo’s breaths were becoming less labored and more regular.
Cesc yawned and tucked his nose into the nape of Leo's neck.
***
One afternoon Cesc woke up alone and sat up, blinking, feeling disoriented and a little cross. He had gotten so used to napping with Leo that the bed felt oddly large and even a little chilly without him.
Then the door to their room squeaked, and Leo appeared, his eyes huge in his still, white face.
“What’s the matter - are you okay?” Leo went from white to red almost instantaneously.
“Um,” he mumbled, looking at his toes. “I, um, had to go to the bathroom.”
Cesc frowned. “Is that all? Why do you look so freaked out?”
“I’m-wearing-your-underwear,” Leo said all in a rush, and then clamped his lips shut as if to prevent anything more humiliating from coming out of his mouth.
Maybe Cesc was still asleep. “Why…?”
Leo just stood there, mute and blotchy.
“Wet dream,” Geri’s sleep-roughened voice intoned from above Cesc’s head. “He didn’t have a change, and mine wouldn’t fit him.”
Leo had flinched at the words and hunched his shoulders, as if by doing so he could make himself invisible. Looking at him, Cesc suddenly wasn’t sure that it was as impossible to die of embarrassment as he’d always been told.
“Leo, it’s okay,” Cesc said, fighting the urge to laugh. “It’s normal. Happens to guys our age all the time.” Geri’s mom had explained it all to him one morning after he’d spent the night at their house, and she was a doctor. (Cesc was more than a little in love with her. She was just like Geri, tall and beautiful and scary smart.)
The smaller boy didn’t say anything, but Cesc thought that he could see gratitude in the gaze that flicked towards him, then back to the floor.
“What time is it, anyway?” Cesc asked, rubbing his eyes. He had lost his watch again earlier in the week.
“About half past four,” Geri rumbled above him.
“Awesome,” he said happily. And then, to Leo: “Come back to bed.”
***
It was roughly a week later that Cesc and Leo slept together for the last time.
The day had started like any other: breakfast, classes, practice, and a delicious lunch. Cesc fell asleep almost as soon as he hit the pillow. His dreams were sweet and vaguely arousing, a soft body pressing against his, warm lips on his throat, his chest, and trailing lower. He wanted to move but could not, contented himself with a moan of encouragement.
It wasn’t a sound but rather a lack of it, the stillness beside Cesc, which woke him. He was lying on his back, apparently in his own bed, but still enveloped by the hazy pleasure of his dream, unsure as to whether this was even real. An urgent hard-on tented his shorts. Leo was lying on his side, shirtless, propped up on one elbow, gazing at his face with an intensity that might have been startling.
Instead, it inspired Cesc to cup Leo’s cheek with one unsteady hand and smile. And Leo… Leo leaned down and kissed Cesc awkwardly on the lips.
That cleared Cesc’s sleep-befuddled brain in a flash. He froze, wondering what was happening, and why he hadn’t seen it coming, and whether he could possibly get himself out of this situation without 1) waking Geri or 2) hurting Leo’s feelings. Luckily, Leo took the hint immediately and backed off, almost falling off the bed in his haste. “I’m sorry,” he mumbled, “I’m sorry,” and he grabbed his clothes and trainers and nearly tripped over himself on his way out.
The slam of the door brought Geri’s annoyed, reddening face over the side of the upper bunk. “What the hell was that about?”
Cesc shook his head, still perplexed. “I think I just had my first kiss.”
“What?” Cesc had expected the usual teasing, but Geri sounded as serious as Cesc had ever seen him. His friend’s face disappeared; a second later, his feet replaced it and he slid down to the floor, where he crouched, gazing anxiously at Cesc. “How… I mean, what happened?”
“I don’t know,” Cesc said. “I was dreaming about… uh… you know…”
“Sex?” Geri prompted.
Cesc nodded, wondering why Geri looked so grim. “And then I woke up, and Leo was right there, and…” he trailed off, confused and flustered.
“Do you love him?” Geri asked in a low voice.
Cesc stared. "Of course I love him." How could he not? He was Leo, tiny and determined and insanely talented and his second best friend in the world.
Geri stiffened. Cesc watched that familiar little line form on his forehead, right between his eyebrows.
“Oh,” he said, sounding miserable. “Okay. Well. I won’t…” he took a deep breath. “I won’t tell anyone. And I won’t get in your way.” Without waiting for an answer, he scooped some half-clean clothes off the floor, and a second later, their bedroom door slammed again.
“Shit,” Cesc said aloud to the empty air.
***
Cesc figured that Geri wouldn’t exactly be able to hide, so his first priority was to find Leo and reassure him that he hadn’t ruined their friendship, that everything was going to be okay.
It didn’t take long. Leo was outside, around in back of the building, juggling a ball, biting determinedly on his lower lip. When he saw Cesc, he froze; the ball bounced on the ground and rolled away.
“Leo,” Cesc began, and the smaller boy blushed.
“Cesc, I’m sorry,” he blurted. “I didn’t mean-“
“I know,” Cesc said quickly. “I’m not mad, okay? Still friends?”
Leo gave him a grateful look and nodded. “Great. Let’s go, we don’t want to be late to practice.” He slung an arm around Leo’s shoulders and hugged him close for a second, then hurried him along.
To Cesc’s considerable surprise, Geri wasn’t at practice. He tried to concentrate on their drills, on their mock match, but his heart wasn’t in it. Neither was Leo’s, he could tell. They both dawdled in the shower, maybe in the hopes of avoiding each other, but still managed to emerge at almost the same time. Cesc couldn’t help smiling, no matter how worried he was.
He finally spotted Geri in the dining room once he and Leo had loaded their trays. He was impossible to miss, towering over the other boys at his table, talking animatedly, probably making them all laugh with his usual wit. There were no spaces open. Cesc tried in vain to catch Geri’s eye, then shrugged and sat at an empty table with Leo.
Anxiety didn’t dent Cesc’s appetite. Leo, as usual, ate very little of his food, which he still considered strange even after months at La Masia. He kept stealing sidelong glances at Cesc and then quickly looking down at his plate again. Finally, in a voice so soft that Cesc could barely understand him, he said, “Geri knows, doesn’t he.” It was not a question.
“Yeah,” Cesc admitted. “But don't worry, he won’t tell anyone.”
Now Leo allowed himself to stare openly at Geri, who had quieted down and was wearing a strained smile and looking everywhere but in their direction. “What did he say? When you told him.”
Cesc speared a big chunk of fish with his fork. “It was kind of weird, actually. He asked me whether I loved you.”
“And?” Leo prompted impatiently.
"I said of course I did," Cesc mumbled through his mouthful of cod. He swallowed with difficulty and reached for his glass, took a big gulp of water to wash it down.
Leo gave him a look that was pure exasperation. "You idiot," he said with feeling.
Cesc almost choked in surprise and started to splutter. He set down his glass and fumbled for the napkin in his lap. Leo rolled his eyes and pounded him on the back as he coughed.
"Fine," Cesc gasped plaintively when he finally found the breath to do so, "what should I have said?"
Leo just looked at him, back in silent mode, lips squinched shut as if expecting Cesc to read his mind. As usual. All of a sudden, Cesc's temper flared, and his arms shot out to grab Leo's slim shoulders and give him a little shake. "Well? Tell me!"
Leo was staring back at him, white-faced, eyes wide with shock, his mouth working a little but with no sounds coming out. Cesc abruptly dropped his hands in defeat. "Sorry. I'm sorry." He took a deep, painful breath, let it out in a long sigh. "You don't have to say anything if you don't want to."
"How about," Leo said, so quietly that Cesc had to lean forward to hear him, "'Not as much as I love you'?"
Cesc stared at Leo blankly for a few seconds before the light bulb finally flared on and he broke into a broad, grateful grin.
He excused himself from the table as soon as he could and ran back to their room.
***
It had been a long time since Cesc had clambered up into the top bunk. When he and Geri were kids, it had been tons of fun to take turns sliding under the side rail and onto the floor, or to pretend that they were snipers lying in wait for the enemy, but of course they were too grown up for that now. He squirmed under the sheets, scooting back against the wall so that there would be plenty of room for Geri. He hoped that he wouldn’t have to wait long.
The muffled shriek of “¡Joder!” blasted Cesc awake just about simultaneously with the knee mashing his hand into the mattress.
Geri cursed again and fumbled for the light switch; Cesc flung an arm over his eyes. When he dared to uncover them again, Geri was sitting cross-legged beside him, ducking his head slightly to avoid the ceiling.
“What the hell is this,” he said flatly.
Cesc sat up and beamed at him. “I’ve been an idiot,” he began.
Geri rolled his eyes. “What else is new.”
“No, really. I get it now. And I just wanted to be here when you got back so that I could tell you…”
“Yes?” Geri asked, obviously doing his very best to feign disinterest.
“You’ll always be my favorite,” Cesc said firmly. “You know that, right?” He held out his arms in invitation.
Geri fell into them with an inarticulate grunt.
They held each other tight, Geri’s weight crushing Cesc into the mattress, the familiar smell of his skin surrounding him like a well-worn blanket. Geri’s breaths were loud and harsh in his ear, and so irregular that Cesc suspected… but nah, that would be silly.
After a long moment of this, Geri twisted, probably trying to get comfortable, and Cesc hissed as he took an elbow to the chin. “You were right,” Geri mumbled above him. “This bed isn’t big enough for the both of us.”
Cesc wriggled a little and rolled them onto their sides, still clinging to each other and grinning like loons. “We’ll work it out,” he said simply, and kissed his best friend on the cheek.
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 3958
Warnings: Underage semi-sexual exploration, nothing too explicit
Summary: It doesn't make sense for Leo to leave La Masia for siesta, so naturally he ends up in Cesc's bed. Lionel Messi/Francesc Fábregas/Gerard Piqué bromance/pre-slash, a.k.a. Baby Dream Team romantic friendship problems.
Author’s Notes: Thanks very much to
jezziejay, my faithful beta, and to uphemism for the amazing, adorable artwork she made to accompany this piece! And thanks to the mods of futbal_minibang for providing the pressure I needed to set my work aside for a while and write again.
“My favorite,” Cesc Fábregas whooped as he arrived at the front of the line with his cafeteria tray and spotted the pale, succulent lengths of sausage, still steaming in the pan.
Behind him, his best friend couldn’t contain a snort. “Whatever they happen to put in front of you is your favorite.”
Cesc snagged an extra botifarra with his fingers, winking at the server, who smiled back and pretended she hadn’t witnessed the theft. “It’s a good life philosophy,” he told Geri earnestly over his shoulder. “You should try learning from me.”
Lunch tray loaded up at last, he paused and surveyed the dining room. They’d gotten back from morning practice a little late, between Geri getting singled out for a stern talking-to by the manager and Cesc misplacing his favorite shoes after his shower. Most of the tables were already full of hungry, boisterous boys.
Then Cesc spotted one nearly empty table, and Geri followed his gaze and groaned. “Don’t you dare.”
They had approached Leo Messi together on his very first day, curious about the tiny new kid who'd joined their ranks, but when he couldn't manage to do much more than mumble a greeting back, they'd decided that he was mute or a weirdo and left him alone for the most part. Leo was a wonder on the pitch, where he could let his feet do the talking; off it, he was rarely seen and never heard. Even today in the crowded cafeteria, he seemed to be enclosed in his own private bubble of silent solitude.
“It’s the only table left,” Cesc said out of the side of his mouth. “I’m going in.”
“Fine,” Geri sighed, “I’ll cover you,” and together they squared their shoulders and marched over to the corner table where little Leo sat, pushing his food around half-heartedly with his fork.
“Hey,” Cesc said in his loudest and friendliest voice, just in case the kid was hard of hearing as well as mute. “Remember us? Okay if we sit here?”
Leo looked up at them through his messy brown hair. He didn’t say anything in response, but Cesc decided to interpret his slight shrug as agreement and sat down across from him. When Geri hesitated, looming over the table, Cesc arched his eyebrows meaningfully and jerked his head towards the chair beside him. At last Geri sat, nodding briefly at Leo, who looked down at his still-full plate.
It was undeniably awkward, but after all, they were there to eat, so Cesc set to work. Only towards the end of the silent meal did a sudden thought occur to him. He stopped shoveling his food into his face long enough to look over at Leo and ask, "Hey, Leo? It is Leo, right? Where do you sleep during siesta?"
The other boy reddened and seemed to shrink into himself even further. He shook his head once, slowly. "Nowhere. I mean, I don't sleep here."
"Hey, look, it talks." Geri elbowed his friend in the side. "Where's he supposed to sleep, idiot? They don't give day students a private room just so they can take siesta."
"Ow," Cesc said, frowning. He’d been almost sure that Leo didn't have a room - he would have heard - yet he was still shocked by the confirmation. Naps were Cesc's third favorite thing in the world, right after football and food. He couldn't believe that no one had provided a place for Leo to take them. "But don't you get tired?"
"Sometimes," Leo admitted in a small voice. "But it's okay. I don't mind."
"That's ridiculous," Cesc declared, feeling his face heat with indignation. "It's, it's... inhumane. We should do something about it."
"No, wait," Leo said more loudly, looking alarmed. "I don't want to be a nuisance."
Cesc paused, considering; then, suddenly, the simple, obvious solution came to him. "I know. You can sleep with us."
Geri, who had been taking a sip of his water, choked on it a little and started spluttering. "With us?"
"Well, with me, obviously," Cesc clarified, spearing a slice of botifarra with his fork and thrusting it into his mouth. He chewed blissfully for a few seconds and swallowed. "I mean, there's barely enough room in your bed for you." He reached for the last slice, paused with the fork halfway to his mouth as he registered Geri's discomfort. "What?"
"Thanks, but-" Leo began. He looked from Cesc to Geri and back again. "I mean... I wouldn't want to be in the way."
"Don't worry about it," Geri said breezily; whatever his problem had been, he seemed to have gotten over it. "It's not like you take up much space, and anyway, Cesc here could sleep through a nuclear attack."
"See? It's settled." Triumphant, Cesc rounded the table and leaned down, slinging an arm around Leo's slim shoulders. He looked over at Geri, who was arching his eyebrows as if to convey a message that Cesc couldn’t quite catch.
***
As it turned out, Leo had to make a trip to the toilet, so Geri and Cesc had a chance to talk things over in private for a few minutes after all.
"You don't think that sharing your bed with Leo would be a little... weird?" Geri asked, as soon as the smaller boy was out of earshot.
"Nah," Cesc countered cheerfully. "Remember Víctor and Andrés? They even had their own beds, and everyone knows that they slept together."
Geri frowned. "That's different," he said. "I mean, I heard it was because Andrés was really homesick. Anyway, no one would have dared to make fun of them. Because, Víctor." He winced eloquently, a reference to the time he'd chosen exactly the wrong victim for one of his pranks. Cesc had reason to know, though, that any scars were strictly emotional. And anyway, he wasn't about to allow himself to be diverted from his original agenda.
"You think Leo isn't homesick?" Cesc asked quietly, wondering why Geri was being so difficult about this. "I mean, look at him. His whole family is back in Argentina except for his dad. That's way farther than La Mancha. It's gotta be... um... over a thousand kilometers away."
"More like ten thousand, genius," Geri said. He looked amused now, much to Cesc's relief.
"So he can stay with us?" Cesc asked hopefully.
Geri punched him in the arm, not hard. "Sure," he said lightly. "Never could deny you anything."
Cesc eyed Geri's dessert, luscious crema catalana, still lying almost untouched on his plate. "Are you gonna eat that?"
***
Back in their room, Cesc stripped down to his t-shirt and underpants and slipped into the bottom bunk, feeling full and sleepy. Leo hovered awkwardly by the side of the bed, looking like he might change his mind and bolt at any minute.
“Ven aquí,” Cesc coaxed him, patting the pillow next to his head. “Plenty of room.”
Still, Leo hesitated for a second. Then he toed off his trainers and slid in next to Cesc, still fully clothed, and lay on his side, facing away.
Cesc could sense that Leo was being careful not to touch him, so he deliberately placed his hand on the smaller boy’s hip, ignoring the shiver under his palm. “Sweet dreams,” he murmured in Leo’s ear, just before he felt his face split in a huge yawn. The other boy didn’t respond, but Cesc could feel him gradually relaxing, his breaths becoming slower and more even. He let his own eyelids flutter shut.
When Cesc opened his eyes again, squinting against the slanting afternoon light, he discovered that his hand had drifted down to Leo’s waist, holding him close. He also had a hard-on, which was not exactly unusual these days, and he really hoped that Leo hadn’t noticed. Probably not; Leo was snoring softly, his fine hair tickling Cesc’s nose.
He resisted the strong temptation to push forward against Leo’s warmth, instead pulling away as slowly as he could and rolling onto his back. He wished that he could rub one off here and now – it wouldn’t take much, and Cesc certainly had no secrets from Geri – but he suspected that it would be the height of bad manners after persuading someone to share his bed, especially someone as shy as Leo.
Frustrated, he twisted his body in the tight space between Leo’s back and the cool, bare wall until he was lying on his belly. Squeezing his eyes shut, Cesc ground himself slowly against the mattress, the diffuse pressure soothing to his aching dick. He allowed himself a soft moan of relief. Still, he didn’t want to let it go too far, so after a few seconds, he rolled to his hip and stretched out on his side, the tip of his nose only centimeters from the wall.
When he woke up, Leo was sitting on the floor lacing up his trainers. He looked up when he heard Cesc stir. “It’s almost time for practice,” he chirped, looking as cheerful as Cesc had seen him all day.
***
The ice had been broken. In the weeks that followed Cesc’s first spontaneous invitation, the three of them became inseparable. It didn’t hurt that they soon perfected a play in which Geri would bring the ball out from the back and pass it off to Cesc, who would find Leo at the front with a spot-on through ball. The midget was magic, dribbling his way past the opposition’s defense and chipping the ball cheekily over the keeper nine times out of ten. Off the pitch, they swiftly discovered a shared love of Playstation and pizza.
And then, of course, there were the naps.
Sharing his bed with Leo soon stopped being strange and became a comfortable habit, as simple and natural as lacing up his cleats or stealing bits of food off Geri’s plate. Cesc began to look forward to their daily siesta even more than he had before. He found the warm, slightly sour smell of Leo’s skin filling his nostrils, the way that Leo sighed and shifted in his sleep, to be somehow soothing.
Unlike Cesc, though, Leo often seemed to be troubled by bad dreams, although he never talked about them. Cesc tactfully refrained from mentioning the low, anguished moans his bedmate sometimes made, feet twitching and stubby fingers twisting in the sheets. And if Geri could hear him from the upper bunk, he held his tongue.
One day, though, it was worse than usual. Cesc was dragged right out of a dream when Leo jerked awake and sat up in bed beside him, trembling, his pale face pink and shiny with sweat. He looked lost, even littler than usual, and very much alone.
“Leo?” Cesc said hoarsely, still half-asleep. “Are you okay?”
“Yes,” Leo whispered automatically. And then, even more quietly, “No.”
Cesc rubbed at his eyes, fighting to focus. “What’s wrong?”
“I really miss Mami,” Leo mumbled, his words a soft slur that Cesc could barely make out.
“Me too,” Cesc offered, although he knew that it wasn’t the same. He patted the smaller boy on the shoulder. Leo was rigid, practically vibrating under his hand, but he allowed himself to be pushed back down onto the pillow.
“What would your mama do,” he found himself asking, “if she were here?”
“When I’m sick, or upset,” Leo said wistfully, “she strokes my hair.”
Cesc considered this, then reached out and touched Leo tentatively on the head. Leo’s chestnut brown hair was silky and fine, nothing like the stubborn, black, wiry strands of his own hair. Fascinated, he threaded his fingers through it, then smoothed it down. Leo twisted away and made a small, strangled sound. It took Cesc a second to realize that he was crying.
"Oh, Leo," Cesc said helplessly, and because he couldn't think of anything better to do, he wrapped his arms around the smaller boy and cuddled him close. He couldn't see Leo's face, but he could feel him shuddering as he sniffled. On the football field, Leo was so fast, so agile, that Cesc sometimes forgot how little he really was. He couldn't help feeling, in a strange way, privileged to be the witness to his fragility now.
Anyway, the closeness, the warmth of another body against his own... it was nice. It reminded him of when he and Carlota were little and had crawled into each other's beds during thunderstorms, whispering in the dark so as not to wake their parents. And it seemed to be working; Leo’s breaths were becoming less labored and more regular.
Cesc yawned and tucked his nose into the nape of Leo's neck.
***
One afternoon Cesc woke up alone and sat up, blinking, feeling disoriented and a little cross. He had gotten so used to napping with Leo that the bed felt oddly large and even a little chilly without him.
Then the door to their room squeaked, and Leo appeared, his eyes huge in his still, white face.
“What’s the matter - are you okay?” Leo went from white to red almost instantaneously.
“Um,” he mumbled, looking at his toes. “I, um, had to go to the bathroom.”
Cesc frowned. “Is that all? Why do you look so freaked out?”
“I’m-wearing-your-underwear,” Leo said all in a rush, and then clamped his lips shut as if to prevent anything more humiliating from coming out of his mouth.
Maybe Cesc was still asleep. “Why…?”
Leo just stood there, mute and blotchy.
“Wet dream,” Geri’s sleep-roughened voice intoned from above Cesc’s head. “He didn’t have a change, and mine wouldn’t fit him.”
Leo had flinched at the words and hunched his shoulders, as if by doing so he could make himself invisible. Looking at him, Cesc suddenly wasn’t sure that it was as impossible to die of embarrassment as he’d always been told.
“Leo, it’s okay,” Cesc said, fighting the urge to laugh. “It’s normal. Happens to guys our age all the time.” Geri’s mom had explained it all to him one morning after he’d spent the night at their house, and she was a doctor. (Cesc was more than a little in love with her. She was just like Geri, tall and beautiful and scary smart.)
The smaller boy didn’t say anything, but Cesc thought that he could see gratitude in the gaze that flicked towards him, then back to the floor.
“What time is it, anyway?” Cesc asked, rubbing his eyes. He had lost his watch again earlier in the week.
“About half past four,” Geri rumbled above him.
“Awesome,” he said happily. And then, to Leo: “Come back to bed.”
***
It was roughly a week later that Cesc and Leo slept together for the last time.
The day had started like any other: breakfast, classes, practice, and a delicious lunch. Cesc fell asleep almost as soon as he hit the pillow. His dreams were sweet and vaguely arousing, a soft body pressing against his, warm lips on his throat, his chest, and trailing lower. He wanted to move but could not, contented himself with a moan of encouragement.
It wasn’t a sound but rather a lack of it, the stillness beside Cesc, which woke him. He was lying on his back, apparently in his own bed, but still enveloped by the hazy pleasure of his dream, unsure as to whether this was even real. An urgent hard-on tented his shorts. Leo was lying on his side, shirtless, propped up on one elbow, gazing at his face with an intensity that might have been startling.
Instead, it inspired Cesc to cup Leo’s cheek with one unsteady hand and smile. And Leo… Leo leaned down and kissed Cesc awkwardly on the lips.
That cleared Cesc’s sleep-befuddled brain in a flash. He froze, wondering what was happening, and why he hadn’t seen it coming, and whether he could possibly get himself out of this situation without 1) waking Geri or 2) hurting Leo’s feelings. Luckily, Leo took the hint immediately and backed off, almost falling off the bed in his haste. “I’m sorry,” he mumbled, “I’m sorry,” and he grabbed his clothes and trainers and nearly tripped over himself on his way out.
The slam of the door brought Geri’s annoyed, reddening face over the side of the upper bunk. “What the hell was that about?”
Cesc shook his head, still perplexed. “I think I just had my first kiss.”
“What?” Cesc had expected the usual teasing, but Geri sounded as serious as Cesc had ever seen him. His friend’s face disappeared; a second later, his feet replaced it and he slid down to the floor, where he crouched, gazing anxiously at Cesc. “How… I mean, what happened?”
“I don’t know,” Cesc said. “I was dreaming about… uh… you know…”
“Sex?” Geri prompted.
Cesc nodded, wondering why Geri looked so grim. “And then I woke up, and Leo was right there, and…” he trailed off, confused and flustered.
“Do you love him?” Geri asked in a low voice.
Cesc stared. "Of course I love him." How could he not? He was Leo, tiny and determined and insanely talented and his second best friend in the world.
Geri stiffened. Cesc watched that familiar little line form on his forehead, right between his eyebrows.
“Oh,” he said, sounding miserable. “Okay. Well. I won’t…” he took a deep breath. “I won’t tell anyone. And I won’t get in your way.” Without waiting for an answer, he scooped some half-clean clothes off the floor, and a second later, their bedroom door slammed again.
“Shit,” Cesc said aloud to the empty air.
***
Cesc figured that Geri wouldn’t exactly be able to hide, so his first priority was to find Leo and reassure him that he hadn’t ruined their friendship, that everything was going to be okay.
It didn’t take long. Leo was outside, around in back of the building, juggling a ball, biting determinedly on his lower lip. When he saw Cesc, he froze; the ball bounced on the ground and rolled away.
“Leo,” Cesc began, and the smaller boy blushed.
“Cesc, I’m sorry,” he blurted. “I didn’t mean-“
“I know,” Cesc said quickly. “I’m not mad, okay? Still friends?”
Leo gave him a grateful look and nodded. “Great. Let’s go, we don’t want to be late to practice.” He slung an arm around Leo’s shoulders and hugged him close for a second, then hurried him along.
To Cesc’s considerable surprise, Geri wasn’t at practice. He tried to concentrate on their drills, on their mock match, but his heart wasn’t in it. Neither was Leo’s, he could tell. They both dawdled in the shower, maybe in the hopes of avoiding each other, but still managed to emerge at almost the same time. Cesc couldn’t help smiling, no matter how worried he was.
He finally spotted Geri in the dining room once he and Leo had loaded their trays. He was impossible to miss, towering over the other boys at his table, talking animatedly, probably making them all laugh with his usual wit. There were no spaces open. Cesc tried in vain to catch Geri’s eye, then shrugged and sat at an empty table with Leo.
Anxiety didn’t dent Cesc’s appetite. Leo, as usual, ate very little of his food, which he still considered strange even after months at La Masia. He kept stealing sidelong glances at Cesc and then quickly looking down at his plate again. Finally, in a voice so soft that Cesc could barely understand him, he said, “Geri knows, doesn’t he.” It was not a question.
“Yeah,” Cesc admitted. “But don't worry, he won’t tell anyone.”
Now Leo allowed himself to stare openly at Geri, who had quieted down and was wearing a strained smile and looking everywhere but in their direction. “What did he say? When you told him.”
Cesc speared a big chunk of fish with his fork. “It was kind of weird, actually. He asked me whether I loved you.”
“And?” Leo prompted impatiently.
"I said of course I did," Cesc mumbled through his mouthful of cod. He swallowed with difficulty and reached for his glass, took a big gulp of water to wash it down.
Leo gave him a look that was pure exasperation. "You idiot," he said with feeling.
Cesc almost choked in surprise and started to splutter. He set down his glass and fumbled for the napkin in his lap. Leo rolled his eyes and pounded him on the back as he coughed.
"Fine," Cesc gasped plaintively when he finally found the breath to do so, "what should I have said?"
Leo just looked at him, back in silent mode, lips squinched shut as if expecting Cesc to read his mind. As usual. All of a sudden, Cesc's temper flared, and his arms shot out to grab Leo's slim shoulders and give him a little shake. "Well? Tell me!"
Leo was staring back at him, white-faced, eyes wide with shock, his mouth working a little but with no sounds coming out. Cesc abruptly dropped his hands in defeat. "Sorry. I'm sorry." He took a deep, painful breath, let it out in a long sigh. "You don't have to say anything if you don't want to."
"How about," Leo said, so quietly that Cesc had to lean forward to hear him, "'Not as much as I love you'?"
Cesc stared at Leo blankly for a few seconds before the light bulb finally flared on and he broke into a broad, grateful grin.
He excused himself from the table as soon as he could and ran back to their room.
***
It had been a long time since Cesc had clambered up into the top bunk. When he and Geri were kids, it had been tons of fun to take turns sliding under the side rail and onto the floor, or to pretend that they were snipers lying in wait for the enemy, but of course they were too grown up for that now. He squirmed under the sheets, scooting back against the wall so that there would be plenty of room for Geri. He hoped that he wouldn’t have to wait long.
The muffled shriek of “¡Joder!” blasted Cesc awake just about simultaneously with the knee mashing his hand into the mattress.
Geri cursed again and fumbled for the light switch; Cesc flung an arm over his eyes. When he dared to uncover them again, Geri was sitting cross-legged beside him, ducking his head slightly to avoid the ceiling.
“What the hell is this,” he said flatly.
Cesc sat up and beamed at him. “I’ve been an idiot,” he began.
Geri rolled his eyes. “What else is new.”
“No, really. I get it now. And I just wanted to be here when you got back so that I could tell you…”
“Yes?” Geri asked, obviously doing his very best to feign disinterest.
“You’ll always be my favorite,” Cesc said firmly. “You know that, right?” He held out his arms in invitation.
Geri fell into them with an inarticulate grunt.
They held each other tight, Geri’s weight crushing Cesc into the mattress, the familiar smell of his skin surrounding him like a well-worn blanket. Geri’s breaths were loud and harsh in his ear, and so irregular that Cesc suspected… but nah, that would be silly.
After a long moment of this, Geri twisted, probably trying to get comfortable, and Cesc hissed as he took an elbow to the chin. “You were right,” Geri mumbled above him. “This bed isn’t big enough for the both of us.”
Cesc wriggled a little and rolled them onto their sides, still clinging to each other and grinning like loons. “We’ll work it out,” he said simply, and kissed his best friend on the cheek.